Tristi's Favorite Christmas Movies

Although radio stations have been playing Christmas music for nearly a month now, for me, this is when the Christmas season truly begins-right after Thanksgiving. My own personal tradition is to watch as many Christmas movies as I can between Thanksgiving and December 25th, and there are some films I watch over and over again. While this list is by no means complete, it does contain some of my very favorite Christmas movies of all time.

The Nativity Story: This film is a beautiful depiction of the birth of the Savior, presenting Mary and Joseph in a way I'd never envisioned before. The acting, the directing, and the casting were all superb.

The Forgotten Carols: Michael McLean has been presenting this story as a stage play for a decade and a half, and now it's available on DVD. I watched it at my sister's house on Thanksgiving Day and I have every intention of buying it and adding it to my yearly ritual. Truly a masterpiece.


Elf: Buddy is an orphan who accidentally crawled into Santa's bag and was taken back to the North Pole. The elves decide to raise him as one of their own, but it's obvious he's not one of them, and it's not just his towering height of over six feet. When Buddy learns the truth, he decides to search out his real father. With his innocent, childlike perception of the world around him, Buddy helps his crusty old father realize that family is the most important thing there is.

White Christmas: Christmas just isn't complete for me unless I've seen the classic movie, "White Christmas." Bing Crosby's crooning, Danny Kaye's sense of fun, Vera-Ellen's magical toes-it's simply a must-see every year as New York stage actors meet budding starlets and get swept away to Vermont, where a lack of snow is killing the ski season for a small hotel. It all becomes personal when the owner of the hotel is revealed to be the old commanding officer of the two performers, and they decide to put on a show to bring business into the hotel.

The Santa Clause series: What if Santa fell off your roof, you put on his suit, and became Santa yourself? What if you hated it, but eventually the spirit of the calling rested on you, and you became the best Santa there ever was? Scott Calvin knows what this feels like. After fighting the inevitable and learning to accept it in the first movie, he then has to fight to keep the right to be Santa in the second film, and finishs up in the third movie by helping the world remember that Christmas is based on love. These are movies you can (and should) watch with your whole family.

Mr. Krueger's Christmas: Willie Krueger is a widowed janitor who spends his days serving others and his nights alone in his tiny apartment with no one for company but his cat, George. This solitude doesn't stop him from enjoying the Christmas spirit, and he decorates his apartment with anticipation of the holiday to come. When a little girl reaches out to him and includes him in her celebration, he is deeply touched at the thought of having a friend. The highlight of this film shows Mr. Krueger (artfully played by Jimmy Stewart) imagining he is at the manger, visiting the Christ-child and thanking Him for everything.

I could go on indefinitely. Many wonderful films have been created to celebrate this most special time of year. I encourage you to seek them out and spend a little extra time bringing the spirit of the holiday into your home. Crank up the radio a little louder and sing along with the carols. Smile to the other shoppers at the store. Give a gift to someone who might be a little down on their luck. And may you have a wonderful month filled with memories that will last you the whole year through.

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Twilight (2008)

If you had asked me, say, two years ago, “Tristi, will there ever come a day when you will be excited to go see a movie about vampires and werewolves?” I would say to you, “As if!” And yet, last Saturday evening, there I was, standing in line with my good friends to enter the theater to see “Twilight.” Amazing, the little twists and turns of fate.

I wasn’t sure what to expect or to hope for. I was intrigued by the books because they are very different from anything I’ve ever read. My visiting teaching companion told me I had to read them, and she lent me the first one. I went into it with apprehension. To my great surprise, I couldn’t put the thing down.

Now with the release of the movie, I had to wonder, did the filmmakers accurately portray the book? How is this going to translate onto the big screen? I was pleasantly surprised.

A quick run-down of the plot, just in case you’re one of the ten people on the planet who haven’t heard of the book series by Stephenie Meyer:

Bella Swan is a seventeen-year-old girl who goes to live with her father in his home of Forks, Washington, which gets the most rainfall of any place in the United States. As a high school student, she struggles to find her classes and to establish her place, mostly because she feels uncomfortable in her own skin. She is drawn toward five teenagers who seem to be just perfect—they’re gorgeous, they have beautiful clothes, they’re graceful. One of them in particular calls out to her. His name is Edward, and he’s just plain irresistible. However, when he’s assigned to be Bella’s lab partner, he can’t stand to be around her.

We learn that he’s a vampire, and her blood smells delicious to him. He has to make a choice—either stay entirely away from her, or learn to live with the smell. You see, he feeds on animals rather than humans, making him a “vegetarian” vampire, and he doesn’t want to hurt Bella. The more time he spends with her, the more used to her scent he becomes, and soon they are in love, linked by cosmic forces as well as the normal laws of attraction.

Their romance is somewhat shadowed by the disapproval of some of the members of Edward’s family, who feel that Bella’s involvement with them will be dangerous. It turns out to be the truth—a rival group of vampires catch a whiff of Bella and want her for themselves. One in particular, James, decides to make Bella his personal quest, and hunts her down across the country, when Edward and his family must battle him to the death in order to protect Bella.

I really liked the final battle scene, which was pulled off so much better than it was in the book. It was a little gruesome … although, if you’re expecting a movie about vampires to not be gruesome, that’s a pretty unrealistic expectation. That said, it wasn’t as gruesome as it could have been. The filmmakers essentially showed us enough to tell us the story, without making it gory. In addition, while Meyer took a lot of flak for the sensuality in the book, the movie had hardly any.

My only three complaints with the film are these: first, Edward’s make-up could have been done more realistically. He was pale and his lips were red, but there were moments when he looked like he’d dunked his face in flour and then smeared on his mommy’s lipstick. Second, in the scene where he tells Bella that he’s a vampire, he won’t hold still and she won’t listen to him. He’s bouncing around on tree branches like Tigger, and she’s interrupting him every five seconds to tell him she’s not afraid. That whole scene could have been redone, in my opinion. Third, I didn’t care for the casting of Jacob. He’s too baby-faced, and his teeth were too white. Kid looked like a toothpaste commercial. I would like to have seen them use an actor who had a little more machismo—I mean, he’s a wolf, for crying out loud. I can’t picture that actor becoming a wolf.

All that said, I enjoyed the film. It wasn’t as hokey as I worried it would be, and I was glad to note that they set things up for the next movie. I’ll look forward to seeing that one as well.

Oh, and keep your eyes out for a cameo by Stephenie Meyer.

This movie is rated PG-13 for violence.

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Kit Kittredge: An American Girl (2008)

The “American Girl” company sends a catalog to my house every so often, and my daughter snatches it up. Each page features a doll that represents a different era in our nation’s history, and you can order accessories to go with them, including books that tell the dolls’ stories. When I first learned that a movie would be made based on one of the dolls in the series, I knew my daughter would want to see it. I was right. But then, I’m always right… Right?

The film stars Abigail Breslin as Kit, a girl who wants to be a reporter. She has her own typewriter and spends her time writing articles, hoping to someday be published in the newspaper. It hasn’t happened yet, but that doesn’t keep her from trying.

The country is reeling from the effects of the Great Depression, and the Kittredge family is not immune. When Kit’s father Jack loses his job at the car dealership and is unable to find another, he decides to leave their Cincinnati home to find work in Chicago. Kit can hardly bear to see him go. Her dearest possession in life is her family, and she’s terrified of losing him.

She and her mother rearrange the furniture in the home and prepare to take in boarders. Kit hates the social stigma this gives her—all the kids at school know her family is struggling and they tease her. She holds her head high and refuses to crumble, finding new compassion for the other children in her situation.

As time passes with no word from Jack, the family does the best it can. The boarders almost become like family as they face the era’s tribulations together, especially with the hysteria that sweeps through the town as a rash of crime breaks out. The townspeople blame the hobos that live on the edge of town, but Kit knows some of the hobos and she can’t believe they would be responsible. She determines to get to the bottom of the story, and she does, but not without putting herself at risk.

There’s just enough danger to cause tension, but nothing really bad happens. We end on an unrealistically joyful note with everything being solved within ten minutes, and on Thanksgiving, no less. Despite the contrived happy ending, you can’t help but feel a little sniffly as justice is served, the family is reunited, and hope springs forth for a new day.

Despite the corny ending definitely aimed at the preteen viewer for which the film was created, I found a lot of worth in this film. I used it as a jumping-off point to talk to my children about the Great Depression. Many important historical elements were depicted, from the despair of the people to the creative ways they found to entertain themselves when they didn’t have money to go out on the town. We saw not only the fear that filled their hearts but the joy in the little things as they learned how to take happiness wherever they could.

If you’re looking for a family film that will appeal to your preteen daughter, this one is well worth your time.

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Deep Thoughts about Gummy Peach Rings

I bet you didn't know you could have deep thoughts about peach rings. Well, it takes a special kind of talent, but it can be done.

You'll recall that a year ago, August 2007, I gave up chocolate. It was a necessity for me-I was eating a lot of it, ruining my health, and making it my source of comfort instead of turning to God to give me strength. I went chocolate-free with the Lord's help.

During that time, I discovered that other things could also taste good. I'd always headed right for chocolate in the past, but I learned that cinnamon is delicious, Swedish fish have always been a favorite, and I rediscovered gummy peach rings, something I'd gotten from time to time as a child.

After nine months of being chocolate-free, I did indulge again, and now I do eat it from time to time, although not as compulsively as before. But I've learned something else.

It wasn't the chocolate that was the problem. It's food that is the problem.

Taking the chocolate away was one thing. It showed me that I do have the ability to turn away from something I love. That was vital knowledge, because I didn't think I could do it before. I honestly give all the credit to Heavenly Father for stepping in and taking that over for me. I could not have done it alone.

But the problem extends much deeper than just chocolate. It's food. Pure and simple. It almost doesn't seem to matter what kind-I just like it. I'm kidding myself if I think that going chocolate-free is the answer to my problems, when I'm still eating all the other goodies that are out there. Substituting gummy peach rings for chocolate doesn't work if I'm eating gummy peach rings every time I get upset.

With all of this ruminating comes the realization that until I tackle my addiction to food in a broad-spectrum way, it never will be conquered. So I'm going back on the twelve-step program I used to get off the chocolate, and I'm going to tackle food as a whole. Going off the chocolate showed me that it can be done, and now I need to apply those principles I've learned to the entire problem. Wish me luck.

Leatherheads (2008)

Back in 1925, professional football was nothing like it is today. There was no football commissioner, there were few rules, and there was very little recognition for a job well done. In fact, the only men playing it were the men who simply loved the game.

One such was Dodge Connelly (George Clooney). He’s in his mid-forties and has the gray hairs to prove it, but football is his passion. It’s all he knows. When his team’s sponsor bails due to lack of public interest, Dodge decides to do whatever he can to save the team.

Touting a few little white lies, he manages to convince the nation’s top college football player to come join their team. A war hero, Carter Rutherford is America’s golden boy. He’s smart, he’s athletic, he’s patriotic, and Dodge thinks that with Carter’s appeal, they’ll be able to draw the crowds and finally see some cash come in at the box office.

However, there’s a problem with Carter’s story—he’s not a war hero. Lexie Littleton (Renee Zellweger), reporter for the Chicago Tribune, has a hot tip that Carter has been lying about his deeds of bravery on the battlefield. Her editor promises her a nice promotion if she can get the truth, so that’s exactly what she decides to do.

Telling Carter she wants to do a story on him, but not what kind of story, she follows Dodge’s team as they travel around the country, and she interviews Carter every chance she gets. As she and Carter grow closer in a journalistic sense, she and Dodge grow closer romantically, although on the surface, they fight like cats and dogs. Yeah, that’s chemistry for you.

When Carter finally breaks down and reveals the truth to Lexie, she’s torn. Carter’s a good kid; he just got confused along the way, and she’s not sure if she should write the expose or not. But when Carter’s agent makes a veiled threat, she realizes she has to tell the story for the sake of honesty.

The film is rated PG-13 for two fistfights and rough skirmishes on the football field. It also contained some language that didn’t bother me personally, but might be of concern to a more sensitive viewer than myself.

This movie is full of great humor, inspiring moments of true sportsmanship, and did I mention it stars George Clooney? I can think of few better reasons to see a film than those. Clooney not only stars but directs, and does a really good job with this film that will leave you cheering at the end.

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It Was So Providential!

I had an awesome Saturday, just so you know.

It all started when I went here:

This is Humdinger Toys/Provident Book, an absolutely awesome new store located in Pleasant Grove at 661 W. State Street. My signing was at eleven o'clock, and I had a great time.

First off, Karlene (bless her heart) gave me a shelf all to myself. This may be the only time in my life that such a thing occurs, so I wanted to commemorate this event.

I met blog friend Daron Fraley for the first time after "knowing" him online for a few months.

This is Karlene, me, Jennie, and Nancy.

Nancy and Candace.

Candace signing.

Me with Haley Hatch Freeman.

And if this star-studded lineup wasn't enough for you, I also chatted with Terri Ferran, Michele Ashman Bell, Heather (H.B.) Moore, Julie Coulter Bellon, Nancy Anderson, and a slew of other authors who were new to me and therefore, I can't remember their names right off the bat.

Now that was just the booksigning portion of my day. Let me show you how cool this store is.

First off, look at these awesome scripture totes. They're so nice, they look like high-end purses, not those tapestry whatsits we're all carrying right now. I'd buy one to carry to nice occasions and put my purse stuff in it instead.

In addition to an awesome book selection, the store also carries toys, games, and old fashioned candy. Here are just a few pictures:
The toys in this place are not your dollar-store cheapies. These are high quality, built-to-last toys that will be passed on from child to child in your family. They have some of the old classic toys, like Slinky Dog, as well as many modern favorites. Science kits, magic tricks, magnet toys-the thing that excites me so much about these toys is the fact that they're designed to make a child think while playing. I could easily sell my house and spend all the money on stuff from this store.

I encourage all of you in the Utah Valley area to head on down to Provident Books and check this place out! There's nowhere like it that I've seen. I'm also going to be holding my Opening Night party there when "Secret Sisters" comes out, so stay tuned for more information about that.

Bells Are Ringing (1960)

Let's take a little trip back in time to the classic movies of the 1960s. Dean Martin and Judy Holliday star in "Bells Are Ringing," a fun musical comedy about all the things that can happen when you're just trying to help someone.

Holliday plays Ella Peterson, a young lady who works as an operator for the Susanswerphone company. Her job is to take messages as they come in and relay them to the appropriate people, like a human answering machine. But Ella isn't a machine; she's very much alive, and she can't help but be concerned about her clients. She has a tendency to go a little beyond the call of duty, helping clients with jobs get in touch with clients who are looking for jobs. And one client gets far more attention than he really should.

His name is Jeffrey Moss, and he's a playwright. He gets calls all the time from his producer, and Ella dutifully takes the messages. One day, she gets the message that if Jeffrey doesn't show up at a certain time for a meeting, he'll lose his contract. When Jeffrey doesn't respond to his wake-up call, Ella's in a tight position.

You see, she's been in love with Jeffrey from the moment she heard his voice. He seemed to need a mother figure in his life, so she pretends to be an older woman known to him as "Mom." With the safety of anonymity, she listens to his problems, gives him advice, and becomes someone he leans on. This message from his producer will make or break his career, and she can't bear to see him sleep through his meeting.

But the plot has thickened. The police are investigating the Susanswerphone company with the belief that it's really an escort service. Ella is given a strict command to stop getting involved with her clients. What is she going to do?

Well, she does what any love-stricken telephone operator does - she goes to Jeffrey's apartment and wakes him up personally. What follows is a sweet romance, but if Jeffrey finds out who Ella is, or if the police find out she contacted him, she could be in a whole lot of trouble.

This movie kept me laughing from beginning to end. Holliday originated this role on Broadway, so she was a natural to star in the film version. Martin introduces the classic song, "Just In Time," which became an American standard. If you love a good comedic romance, this one's for you!

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Kathleen McBroom Still Missing

Here is the latest news article on the search for Kathleen McBroom, whom many of us know as "Beany" from "So Grateful to Be Mormon." Please keep your prayers coming, guys - even if she's no longer living, having closure would mean so much to her family right now.

Whitney Award Auction

Last March, something amazing happened. The best LDS authors in the business came together to receive recognition for their hard work and accomplishments at the first annual Whitney Awards ceremony. It was an incredible evening and I was so impressed by the work that went in to creating this award, carrying off the program, advertising, finding the judges, reading all the nominees ... this was truly a huge undertaking and the Whitney Awards committee deserves a standing ovation for all they put into it.

I'm a strong advocate for literacy and for promoting the cause of LDS fiction. This genre has gotten stronger and stronger over the years and I'm thrilled to see new authors with powerful voices emerge, as well as seeing already established authors continue to hone their skills. This is an exciting time for LDS fiction.

The Whitney Awards seek to honor those authors who have gone beyond the mark, who have created stories of worth and presented them in a way that is appealing to the reader. These books are nominated by the average Joe, then read by the Whitney judges. The five most outstanding books in each category are then presented as finalists, and bookstores, publishers, and authors all over the nation are invited to cast their ballot.

This year, the committee has come up with a great way for us to show our support to the program. An auction is being held to raise the needed funds, and there are some pretty cool items available. You can click here to check it out. New items are being added regularly, so I recommend coming back to the site often so you don't miss anything you'd really like.

I throw my support fully behind this amazing organization and I encourage you to visit the auction site and help raise the funds needed to keep this program going. It's time these awesome authors got the recognition they deserve for their diligence to providing us quality reading material.

You can learn more about the Whitneys by clicking here.

The Little Mermaid: Ariel's Beginning (2008)

Disney's got a definite thing going on with sequels and prequels and companion movies. We've seen it time and time again, although come to think of it, I haven't seen a sequel to "Snow White" yet. I say, it's only a matter of time.

While most of the prequels and sequels and other kinds of "quels" are usually somewhat stupid, I must say, I did enjoy "The Little Mermaid: Ariel's Beginning." Not as much as I liked the original film, but it was pretty decent.

We know from "The Little Mermaid" that Ariel's mother is dead, but we don't know how that came to be. In "Ariel's Beginning," we go back in time to Ariel's childhood, when her mother was still alive. Her mother, Athena, looked remarkably like Ariel herself, and she loved to sing. The entire kingdom of Atlantica was filled with music, and life in the palace was full of joy and love.

But when a pirate ship unexpectedly sails through the cove where the merfolk had gathered for a celebration, Athena disappeared, and King Triton was heartbroken. He hated anything that reminded him of what he had lost, and so he banned music from the kingdom. His routine became very regimented and he spent less and less time with his daughters, taking a walk with them each morning and then dismissing them for the rest of the day into the care of their power-hungry governess, Marina del Ray.

Marina wants Sebastian's job, and she'll do whatever it takes to discredit him so she can move up in ranks. All she needs is one little chink in his armor (no pun intended, but he is a crustacean, after all) and she'll be able to roust him out of his position of favor with the king.

Ariel unknowingly helps Marina in her plan. While following her new friend, Flounder, as he darts suspiciously from rock to rock, she discovers a jazz club deep in the waters of the ocean. Those fish really know how to blow, and to her surprise, Sebastian is the headliner at the club. Ariel is immediately intrigued by this stuff called music and joins the club, but word gets back to Marina, who knows she's found what she needs to throw Sebastian out of the palace for good.

Ariel must find a way to remind her father of the importance of music. It's not just about sounds made by instruments, but about joy and laughter. Most of all, it's about love, and when she helps him remember all the love they once shared as a family, she helps bring peace back into their home and into the king's heart.

There is a little mild peril in this G-rated film, but nothing too over-the-top. You can only see this movie by renting it or purchasing it - it was not released in the theaters.

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Dear Frankie (2004)

“Dear Frankie” is one of the most touching films I’ve seen in the last year. I have included a few spoilers in this review, but I want you to "get" why I loved it so much so you'll rent it too.

Lizzie was seriously abused by her husband, but she stuck with the relationship until he beat their baby son Frankie, causing him to go deaf. Lizzie took Frankie and they’ve been on the run ever since, only living in one place for a short time until moving. Her ex-husband tries to find her, placing ads in the newspaper asking for information about her, and whenever she feels like he’s getting too close, it’s time to move on.

Her mother, Nell, has come with her to help care for Frankie, and they both love the boy fiercely. They would do anything to protect him and to give him a happy life, so when Frankie starts to wonder about his father, Lizzie creates an elaborate story about how his father is a sailor on a ship. She writes Frankie long letters, pretending to be his father, and tells him all about what life is like on the ocean. Frankie looks forward to receiving those letters, and he writes his father back.

In Frankie’s letters, he tells his father things he’s never told his mother, so when Lizzie reads them, she’s learning more about her son than she would ever know otherwise.

Things are going reasonably well until Frankie learns that his father’s ship will be docking nearby within the next week. One of his classmates taunts him, saying that Frankie doesn’t really have a father and that he won’t come for a visit. Frankie immediately writes to his father, asking if he’s coming. When Lizzie gets the letter, she goes into a tailspin. How on earth is she going to explain to her son that his father can’t come for a visit? Instead, she decides to hire a man to pretend to be Frankie’s father, just for the day.

The man’s name is never known to us as the viewer. Instead, he asks Lizzie to call him Davey, Frankie’s father’s name. He shows up right on time, brings Frankie a gift, and spends the entire day doing just the things Frankie wants to do. Lizzie is delighted. Frankie is happy, he hasn’t learned the truth, and she thinks it’s over. But Davey wants another day, and he wants to spend it with Frankie and Lizzie both.

She’s extremely reluctant, but for Frankie’s sake, she goes along with it. Davey gives them a wonderful day. He treats Lizzie like a queen. He pays attention to everything Frankie communicates, and he shows them both what it would be like to have a good, kind man in their lives. Davey is in every way the kind of man they need. But he really is a sailor, and he has to leave. When he goes, Lizzie discovers that he's slipped his payment back into her coat pocket. He gave them the two most wonderful days of their lives, and he wouldn't take money for it.

We end the movie with Frankie writing to his new friend, who posed as his father. He knows it’s not really his father, and we are left with the strong sense that as soon as "Davey" can, he’ll sail back and claim Lizzie and Frankie for his own.

I cried multiple times during this film. The devotion Lizzie has for her son, the caring Davey demonstrates to Lizzie and Frankie—I was literally aching for him to come back when the film ended. Good, honorable men do exist in this world, and Lizzie deserved a man like that to love. Frankie deserved a father like that.

Although it’s emotionally difficult to watch, I strongly recommend this beautiful film. I will be thinking about it years from now, it impacted me so greatly.

It has been rated PG-13 for some crassness on the part of Frankie’s schoolmate. However, if you want to keep your clicker in your hand and just skip over that part, you’ll be fine. When Frankie goes to his new school and the boy motions for him to come over, just hit fast-forward for about five seconds. The strong Scottish accents are also a little hard to understand, but I'm told that if you turn on the subtitles, you'll get along a lot better. (I didn't think of that ...)

Enjoy.

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By Their Fruits, We Shall Know Them

The election is over and Obama is the new president. I voted for McCain and I have serious reservations as to what the next four years will bring to our country. Obama has presented some plans that I don't agree with. I hope Congress vetoes many of them.

However, now is not the time to bellyache and squawk about the loss to the Republican party. Yes, we're disappointed. But we did everything we could and we lost. What we do now may prove to be even more important than what we did before. How are we going to react to this election?

For those of us who were behind the McCain/Palin ticket, I feel we need to step back and analyze how this Obama/Biden presidency will affect us. How are we going to ride the waves of change as they come? Are we mentally prepared to deal with the new laws, the new ways of doing things, as they come about? In short, are we strong enough to be flexible, or will we shatter in the face of change?

I'm apprehensive, I won't lie to you. Obama made a nice acceptance speech. But we won't know how much of that is truth until we see him in action. We've also heard him make some pretty unusual statements about his goals for this country. We'll see how those pan out as well. By his fruits, we'll know what kind of man the nation just elected. Perhaps my apprehensions are unfounded. I won't know for a while yet. But my goal now is to batten down my hatches and prepare myself for the winds of change as they blow.

Um ... Hello?

Why are you sitting there reading blogs? Go vote! Then come back and read blogs.

Napoleon Dynamite (2004)

Part of my duty as a movie reviewer is not just to recommend films I enjoyed, but to tell you about films I did not enjoy. Of course, you are more than welcome to take my opinions with a grain of salt and make up your own minds about what to watch. I fully expect dissenting opinions. That’s why it’s so great to have so many different kinds of movies made each year – there’s something to appeal to every taste.

With that rather lengthy disclaimer out of the way, I shall now launch into my review of “Napoleon Dynamite,” which, I’m told, is rather a favorite amongst certain of our young people. I don’t know if it’s a sign that I’m just getting old or what, but this was honestly the strangest movie I’ve ever watched.

I blame my husband for the whole thing. It was his birthday and he wanted to see it. Well, how do you deny the birthday boy his wish? I put the movie in my Netflix queue and it arrived in time for his birthday. We sat down and watched it together. He laughed. I did not.

I’m a bit hard-pressed to summarize the plot, as there really wasn’t one. But I’ll do my best.

Napoleon lives with his brother Kip and his grandmother in a small Idaho town. When Grandma needs emergency surgery, Uncle Rico comes to keep an eye on the boys while Grandma recovers at the hospital. Napoleon helps his new friend Pedro run for class president, meets a shy girl named Deb, and tells his uncle to take a hike when his get-rich-quick schemes get him in trouble. Oh, and Kip runs off with a woman he met online.

Each of these storylines could have been developed into something interesting, yet the movie was organized into bits and pieces. We got just a couple minutes into one storyline before we were whisked off into another. I didn’t feel that anything was developed enough to give us a story. And the things we did get … were dumb.

Napoleon is a hapless teenager who isn’t very smart, isn’t very athletic, isn’t very talented, and essentially has nothing going for him at all. And I mean, at all. The movie makers could at least have made him a sympathetic character so we cared what happened to him, but his ornery attitude kept me from identifying with him. If he’d shown a softer side, I would have been in his corner. As it was, I spent the movie thinking, “Why should I care what happens to this cranky, snotty kid?”

My husband said the movie was typical of small town life and he thought it was great. Well, I’ve lived in a few small towns myself, and I don’t see it. I have gathered, though, that this is more of a guy’s movie. Maybe if I were a guy, I’d be all over it.

I’ve heard people say, “I love to quote that movie.” You know, I was listening pretty carefully because I love a great movie quote. (My favorite of all time? “Obviously you’ve never been to Singapore.” Pirates of the Caribbean, Curse of the Black Pearl) But I didn’t pick up on anything “quotable” in the film. The writing was so-so, the acting was so-so, the story was so-so.

I’m sorry for such a rambling, disorganized review, but I have to say, that exactly matches the tone of the movie. It was rambling. It was disorganized. It just didn’t have any substance to it. I can’t even say it was fun in a silly sort of way. There wasn’t enough fun to qualify.

Again, I know some of you will probably just love it. But I have to call ‘em as I see ‘em. And I say, waste of time. It was pretty clean, though.

This film was rated PG.

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I'm Painting My Children Green, I'm Painting My Children Green ...

I have a strict personal rule - I do not post pictures of my children on the Internet. Well, I'm relaxing that rule just a bit because they aren't recognizable. That's the whole point of Halloween, right?

Well, this year they decided to be the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I have four children, and their personalities somewhat correspond with those of the Turtles, so we decided to go for it. I made the masks (this is why they look dumb - I don't sew) and I was deliberating about face paint when Kim says to me, "Use acrylics." I decided she was wise, so I went to Wal-Mart and got some. Well, this is where my natural "duh" kicked in. I know that regular acrylic washes right off, but apparently the shiny variety, not so much. I grabbed the right shade, didn't notice it was shiny, and was on my way.

My children are no longer green, but they aren't very happy.

Good thing they have a lot of candy to cheer themselves up with.

Families are Forever ... Politics -- Not So Much

My Visiting Teachers came over the other day and one of them expressed concern over a difficulty in her family. Her parents are staunch Republican and her husband's parents are staunch Democrats. As we are facing possibly the most important election we've seen in our lifetimes, the debates rage not only on television, but in homes and between family members, and this sister is feeling torn. No matter how she votes, one side of the family will be angry with her.

As a side note, we're encouraged not to discuss politics when we visit teach, and I agree with that counsel. She brought up the election only as being the catalyst of a family argument, not for the purposes of discussing politics.

It's important that we vote our conscience this next Tuesday. Each registered voter in the nation will have the opportunity to walk into that poll booth and choose a candidate. We should understand the issues and discuss them with those around us. However, if those discussions are disrupting family relationships, it's time to pull back a little bit.

Arguing with Great-uncle Bertrand about his choice for president is not going to change his mind about who to vote for. But it will damage your relationship if you don't approach him with love and respect. I might disagree with the politics of certain of my family members, and they might disagree with mine. And while these election is hugely important and we all hope it goes our way, nearly half of us are going to be disappointed. Regardless of who wins the election, Bertrand is still your uncle.

I'm not trying to dissuade you from sharing your political beliefs. Far from it -- I think we all should calmly and respectfully share our reasons for voting the way we do. But let's keep in mind the simple truth that our family belongs to us, and we are tied to them for much longer than the term of president. Whoever comes to power in January will have, at most, eight years in office. Our families are forever. Let's not damage eternal relationships with careless words. Let's make sure to keep our conversations polite and respectful, even if we feel the need to disagree.